Today, I have mostly been....

[slinger]

Asleep, after a crap night of not doing much of that.

[CN211276]

A lazy day. Nice to get out this afternoon for a walk after the storm. Quite Spring like. Some of the branches which came down in the night had new leaves on. Our repaired fence stood up well, cost the best part of £400 thanks to Ciera.

[karatestu]

Sat in hospital for a few hours today, its bloody depressing. I must say things are looking up slightly today. My mum is 76 and has MS, dementia and can't walk. Some would say her quality of life is poor but she's my mum and i dont want her to go. Her carers have her laughing sometimes and that is the most wonderful thing to see., it really is. Last year in summer she said to me "Happy Christmas Stuart". I just went along with it.

She said not too long back that she had forgotten to milk the cows and that had i caught the turkey yet that had got out and was running around.

[slinger]

My late wife was "away with the fairies" - as she herself would have put it - a lot of the time towards the end, although I think that was mostly down to all the different drugs they were putting into her.

[NSNO2021]

My thoughts are with you Stu. For me the hardest part about dementia is when a loved one forgets who you are. I accepted my dad's bursts of anger, frustration and confusion. I was gently amused by travelling around Europe without leaving the comfort of the sofa, or his insistence of going upstairs in my bungalow but the who are you is a tough one.

[_D_S_J_R_]

Sat in hospital for a few hours today, its bloody depressing. I must say things are looking up slightly today. My mum is 76 and has MS, dementia and can't walk. Some would say her quality of life is poor but she's my mum and i dont want her to go. Her carers have her laughing sometimes and that is the most wonderful thing to see., it really is. Last year in summer she said to me "Happy Christmas Stuart". I just went along with it.

She said not too long back that she had forgotten to milk the cows and that had i caught the turkey yet that had got out and was running around.

Stu, 'we' may be poles apart and miles away, but I feel for you buddy. Hope you have close family and friends to help you through it. Take care... D

[karatestu]

Thanks for the kind words Dave. I have three half sisters but only two are my mum's. One lives in Cyprus and has cut all ties and the other lives in Hampshire. I am left to do just about everything concerning my mum because i am the only one around and i only live half a mile away.

It was the same with my father. He suddenly lost use of his legs, had an operation to free a trapped nerve in his back and was just starting to learn to walk again. One day months after the operation he was in awful pain and was still in a wheelchai5r at that point. Rushed to hospital. Turned out that surgeons had infected his spinal cord with MRSA and that caused an abscess at the top of his spine.

Nearly died and spent a month in critical care the first part on a ventilator. Went to a spinal ward at Pinderfields hospital and was nearly a year there. He ended up being almost quadriplegic - could move his arms a bit but couldn't move his fingers at all. He survived for ten years after that living in a nursing home in Selby. I used to pick him up every sunday in a wheelchair accessible car and take him out for the afternoon to see his friends and look at what was happening in the fields round and about. I think that kept him going and i only missed about a dozen sundays in those ten years.

Being almost quadriplegic meant he did not have much lung power and had very lttle ability to cough. We soon realised that lung infections were going to happen a lot. In 2010 he got his first dose of pneumonia and almost died. I dont know how he pulled through and i can still remember the nurses putting a pipe down his throat and sucking the crap out of his lungs. A very distressing time for everyone but he survived another two years until getting pneumonia again. I saw him turn blue when they rolled him over in bed one day. That was the beginning of the end. Eventually he had had enough and pulled all the tubes out of himself and removed his oxygen mask. He got very angry at the end and passed away in front of me. It was the most awful thing to watch and haunts me to this day. It was like watching someone drown in their own bodily fluid.

Just so glad he saw my son for the first 18 months of his life. I never wanted kids but when both my parents became ill at the same time (my mum started with MS after some brain electric shock treatment) little did i know how my mind would eventually change. After a few years of severe alcoholism and several incidents where i woke up in casualty and not remembering how i got there i decided that my life needed some new life in it rather than just seeing death in my future. Having two kids turned my life around if it wasn't for them and my lovely wife i think i would be six foot under by now.

There you go, i bet that little tale cheered you all up. I have done a great deal for both my parents and whilst my siblings have generally been selfish and left me to it, i feel so glad that i have done all that and my conscience is clear.

Have a good evening. I have a date with San Miguel and his friends.

[ArloFlynn]

Yes Stu, kids totally change everything. Ill parents I found, not so, but equally hard work. Nature meant it that way. So the new life took prescidence over the old.

[ArloFlynn]

Excuse my spelling of presidence.

[Ali Tait]

Precedence.