HiFi Subjectivist ¦ Audio Forum ¦ NVA User Group

I am thinking of inventing something new to take the hi-fi industry by storm. Obviously to do that you can't tell the truth you have to look for catch phrases and marketing themes. So we must include Quantum Tunnelling, Graphite, have a valve connected so it glows, and be called Class A. I now need some help to come up with more hi-fi speak and marketing ideas to turn it into a world leader.

What will the product do / be, well I haven't a clue, I will wait until the marketing is finished then I will find something that will vaguely meet it. Designed to do a job, of course the most important job of all - to make money.

Semi-non oversampling digital tube filters with multiplex bit-perfect asynchronous dedicated analogue output.

Oooo yes! it must have massive heatsinks and weigh over 20 kilos. Material, well Gold has to be somewhere there as well as Zirconium (sounds good), Rare Earth, anymore?

Fully balanced.
Cyrogenically treated.
Ultra purified.

Unique Fusion-Assembled Rectification Triodes (FARTs).

Edible- if u don’t like it just add custard

Oh! and don't forget to mention the Super featherweight thin as a supermodel but strong as concrete "GRAPHENE."

Milled from a solid aluminium billet. Military specifications, so top secret that anyone leaking them will be hunted down and killed. Although it costs £50,000, it is still a bargain. Limited edition of 100, so hurry up and buy one.

Where is the NASA connection?

Backward engineered from alien technology. Preferably Vulcan.